"A Barbie Doll Adorned With Chains" by Arianne Nicole De Leon

I once had a barbie doll, and never thought I’d be one too. 

One humid morning amidst the ever-bustling streets of Manila, my older sister and I were running, hoping to catch the last jeepney with the route passing by our house. As we climbed up in the jeepney, I stealthily made my way to a vacant space while holding my above-the-knees jumper skirt down. After squishing my body in between the two office workers, I vividly remember the stares of disgust, ridicule, mockery, and astonishment, among the other feelings I dissected from the eyes of the people inside. But there is only one stare that I cannot get my mind off. The stare that could make you itch all over and can simply make you uncomfortable to the point of regretting my choice of clothing. Little did I know, the stare was just a start. 

And it was all because of the clothing I wore for my cousin’s birthday. 

In the Philippines, at least one in four Filipino women has experienced gender-based violence, and 41% of victims do not seek help. Nothing is uncommon about cases of violence against women (VAW) in our country, but a woman’s preference for clothing also plays a contributing factor in more opportunities to occur. In other words, the never-ending concept of “victim-blaming” in Filipino culture. 

One of the possible causes would be the stereotypical rape myths that exist in the Philippines. From a Filipino perspective, feminism does not necessarily view women as “weak.” However, the Filipino brand of rape culture primarily revolves around a sense of “superiority” or the ability to overpower someone. In dominant narrative stereotypes, men are usually seen as “sexual aggressors,” while women are “sexual gatekeepers who resist sexual advances to retain purity.” Consequently, many Filipinos, even fellow women, justify and perpetuate male sexual advancements, even if it is to the detriment of women’s rights. 

At an early age, I grew up surrounded by mostly men and was treated the way I deserved to be treated. While in school, I even made male friends and found nothing wrong with it.

Unfortunately, as time passed by, I later discovered that not all men are the same. I believe this also explains why the jeepney experience was so significant to me, as it appears to be the first time I have witnessed the reason why there are so many feminists, not just in our country but in the whole world. Back then, I am one of those girls who thinks that feminism is a way women wants to gain superiority over men. I have held this belief for a long time, even while studying in an all-girls school that is very vocal about women’s rights. Thankfully, this mindset did not last when I experienced what it takes to be a woman. On that jeepney ride, when there were only a few people inside, I noticed a man who seemed to be in his early 30s staring down just below my jumper skirt before eventually winking. It would be a lie if I said I did not feel disgusted and afraid simultaneously after that encounter. Since then, I have worn jeans and ridden in jeepneys where few men are. 

Looking back at it now, I feel defeated and greatly regret the decisions I have made in the past. Not because of my choice of clothing but how I let that one experience sink into my mind and made me think that some random man can control the way I express myself as an individual. If we think about it, women do not need laws to repress their fashion, comfort, or identity. Although my experience was not as intense and brutal compared to the other sexual harassment and gender-based violence cases, it still left a mark and tainted my views on men. I could only imagine how difficult it is for VAW victims, who are afraid to seek help, to continue with their lives, bearing the painful memories of the past. 

Similar to other Asian countries, multiple barriers exist in the Philippines that prevent women from seeking help, such as but not limited to: the economy and sociopolitics. 

Essentially, the patriarchal society permeating Filipino culture primarily drives the normalization of justified wife beating, thus leading to economic abuse in most VAW cases. Additionally, in favor of family reputation, some women tend to compromise safety and security due to expectations to be self-sacrificing. Ultimately, the whole culture of victim-blaming roots in the idea of defying gender norms as it invites shame, guilt, and objectification, especially justification of violence.

In terms of sociopolitical structures, under the previous administration of President Duterte, some women of power chose to remain silent and tolerated the misogynistic behavior of the administration, earning them the apt title “feminists of convenience.” In exchange for their silence, these individuals receive personal and family gains while avoiding political backlash. At the same time, the concept of impunity prevails. 

More often than not, most people think that sexually abused individuals are often adult women being bombarded with a barrage of questions after coming forward. Commonly, “What were you wearing?” is one of them. However, with today’s increased internet exposure, online classes compound the risks of children’s sexual exploitation, especially girls. Consequently, victim-blaming attitudes and behaviors are incompatible with this. Instead, child victims should be treated with empathy and concern. Otherwise, using a victim-blaming approach may downplay the gravity of the abuse committed against them and even support initiatives that lead girls to feel that they are being punished for their unfortunate state. 

With these said, one should encourage help-seeking behaviors more, strengthen women by educating them about their rights, and formulate government policies that can reduce vulnerability to VAW cases in the country to foster a healthy and safe environment for both women and girls. 

As a child, I have been very fond of playing with barbie dolls. I find the idea of controlling a human-formed plastic particularly interesting as I get to vicariously experience the life of an “ideal” woman, as perceived by society. However, I never would have imagined that it also reflects real life. For men, women are like barbie dolls, a source of entertainment and pleasure. Similar to how little girls dress up and make their dolls pretty, men also like to adorn women: with chains. Women are not women if they cannot be controlled. At least, that’s what everyone thinks.

References: 

Valdez, I. K. M., Arevalo, M. V. P. N., Robredo, J. P. G., Gacad, S. L. S., Villaceran, M. A. J., Libang, G. R., Paz, E. P. D., Rubin, K. S. T. A., & Eala, M. A. B. (2022, May 2). Violence against women in the Philippines: Barriers to seeking support. The Lancet Regional Health – Western Pacific. Retrieved from 

https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lanwpc/article/PIIS2666-6065(22)00086-4/fulltext 

Yamsuan, C. C. (2020, July 13). Culture of blaming victims hinders rape cases. INQUIRER.net. Retrieved January 9, 2023, from 

https://newsinfo.inquirer.net/1305894/culture-of-blaming-victims-hinders-rape-cases 

E.3: Blaming child victims. IICSA. (2022, February 1). Retrieved from 

https://www.iicsa.org.uk/reports-recommendations/publications/investigation/cs-organised networks/part-e-recognising-child-victim/e3-blaming-child-victims