Essay by Solenne Alexandrie Santos

In a population of about 100 million people, 84 million Filipinos are Roman Catholic. In reference to the sacrament of marriage, Biblical law states, “so they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”- Matthew 19:6. Being devout Catholic countries, the Philippines and the Vatican are the only two remaining nations where divorce is illegal. While ideally, Church and State are to remain separate entities, one’s influence upon the other is undeniable demonstrated by how state laws align with religious beliefs. While the inability to file for divorce applies to both spouses, the issue is amplified for women as annulment, being the only option, adheres to limited grounds and comes with more repercussions for them as a result of living in a misogynistic culture. 

During a political rally, our President Rodrigo Duterte spoke to the Mayor of Bohol City who had recently separated from her husband stating, “If it were me, why would I ever break up with you? I would really grab and hold onto your panties if you try to leave, even until the garter snaps.” This is only one of the many misogynistic remarks made by the President who is in a 

place of massive influence. With this being the voice that is broadcasted to Philippine society, what can we expect but a culture of toxic masculinity to foster. According to the National Demographic and Health Survey of the Philippines, 1 in every 4 Filipinas have been in a marriage experiencing physical, emotional, or sexual violence from their husband or partner. With the limitations of annulment being extremely severe, infidelity, physical, and mental abuse are not permissible grounds to break off the marriage, forcing women to stay committed to their oppressor. 

Furthermore, “We have a joke here that when you get a wife, you also get a cook, cleaner, nanny, laundress, and maid.” This statement made by Irene Chu, chief administrator to the Mayor of Tacloban City, is unfortunately a sentiment echoed by Philippines society. Societal belief around the country instills that women remain housewives, condoning the subjugation of women by making them financially dependent on their husbands. Furthermore, the annulment law states “No child under 7 years shall be separated from the mother unless there are compelling reasons.” This challenges them to raise children as separated women, a position disapproved of by society. Without access to wages and in addition to carrying the domestic

burden, a woman is left to be reliant on the generosity and mercy of her oftentimes scorned husband, making the prospect of freeing herself an unforeseeable reality. 

In an article written for The Atlantic, freelance journalist Ana Santos wrote “... I left my husband, ..when I finally decided --against my family’s wishes and without their support -- to file for annulment.” Despite suffering from abuse, Santos expressed a lack of support for the dissolution of the marriage, even from her family, as they valued tradition over her well-being. This represents the unfortunate reality for women in Philippine society, where their protection is secondary when family honor and religious traditions are at stake. Furthermore, the judge of her case “probed for the details about the fights [she] had with [her] husband.” In spite of sufficient evidence of infidelity and abuse, the judge stated that she was “too smart for her own good” and suggested that this was the reason why her marriage failed. This notion is due to the stigma that women should hold the family together, which gaslights their realities when they are unable to do so. This case is an unfortunate example of many marital situations in Philippine society where the dysfunctional relationship between the cultural stigmas and what is expected of women leads them to bear consequences for not sacrificing themselves to uphold aforementioned traditions. 

Therefore, to free women from being subjugated to oppression, the society and government need to do their part to provide women with various options to leave their intolerable situation. Primarily, a divorce bill needs to be passed by the Supreme Court which entails a more lenient and reasonable process. In the meantime, there should be more voluntary pro-bono lawyers to lessen the expenses for the women who cannot afford annulment. Ultimately, the government should sponsor special skill training programs for women and subsidies to support their education. These initiatives allow women to rise above the social stigma, equipping them with the knowledge, skills, and finances to feel empowered and secure to leave an irredeemable and oppressive relationship.